The belief in your own great abilities and the feel of self worthy is what is collectively called self esteem. Self esteem can be boosted on people who lack it because low self esteem can bring failures and mental problems like depression.
There are some issues that can cause a person to have low self esteem and this post will discus them.
Here are 10 direct, steps to improve your self-esteem:
1. Stop Negative Self-Talk
Catch yourself when you say things like "I'm not good enough" or "I always mess up." Replace those thoughts with something real but constructive—like “I’m learning” or “I handled that better than before.”
2. Set Small, Realistic Goals
Start with things you can actually achieve. Finish a book. Clean your room. Go for a walk. Every small win builds confidence.
3. Keep Promises to Yourself
Follow through on what you say you're going to do—even the little things. Trust grows when you stop letting yourself down.
4. Surround Yourself with Real Support
Distance yourself from people who constantly criticize or drain you. Keep company with those who respect and encourage you.
5. Focus on What You Can Control
Worrying about things outside your influence kills your confidence. Take action where it counts—your habits, your choices, your attitude.
6. Practice Saying “No”
Setting boundaries is a form of self-respect. Don’t agree to things just to please others. Your time and energy are valuable.
7. Take Care of Your Body
Eat better. Sleep more. Move often. When your body feels better, your mind usually follows.
8. Learn New Skills
Pick up something new—coding, painting, boxing, whatever. Growth builds pride. Confidence comes from competence.
9. Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection
You don’t have to be the best. You just have to be better than you were yesterday. Acknowledge improvements, even if they’re small.
10. Talk to Yourself Like Someone You Love
You wouldn’t trash your best friend when they screw up. So stop doing it to yourself. Be honest, but be kind.
Common causes of low self esteem
Here are the key causes of low self-esteem, broken down without sugarcoating:
1. Critical Upbringing
If you were raised by parents or caregivers who constantly judged, compared, or belittled you, that voice sticks. You start internalizing it as your own.
2. Bullying or Abuse
Verbal, emotional, or physical abuse—especially repeated over time—can destroy your sense of worth. It teaches you to see yourself as powerless or unlovable.
3. Unrealistic Standards
Trying to live up to perfectionist expectations—your own or others’—can leave you feeling like a failure no matter what you do.
4. Social Comparison
Constantly measuring yourself against others (especially online) can make you feel like you’re always falling short, even if you’re doing fine.
5. Past Failures or Trauma
One or two big mistakes, rejections, or traumatic experiences can leave lasting dents in how you see yourself, especially if they were never processed or healed.
6. Lack of Positive Reinforcement
Going unnoticed, unappreciated, or unsupported over time creates a void. When no one reflects back your value, it’s hard to see it yourself.
7. Toxic Relationships
Partners, friends, or coworkers who manipulate, ignore, or constantly criticize you can chip away at your self-worth bit by bit.
8. Mental Health Issues
Anxiety, depression, and other mental health struggles can distort your self-image. They make you feel like a burden or a failure, even when that’s not true.
9. Societal Pressure
Messages from media, culture, or community about how you should look, act, or live can make you feel "not enough" if you don’t fit the mold.
10. Fear of Judgment
When you feel like you're constantly being watched, judged, or rejected by others, it can lead to shame and self-doubt that kills your confidence.
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